Dreaming of a baby boy

Now you are all going to think I am seriously weird, as I had a very strange dream last night.

It was a bright sunny day and I found myself outside a pub with my three-day-old baby son in my arms. I was delighted at all the strangers in the beer garden saying ‘oh look at that lovely baby. I thought to myself that’s what I used to say when I saw mothers with their new babies, now I have my own and he is all mine (gleeful smug hugging feeling happening at this moment). Then I bumped into Mum in the car park and she said ‘he doesn’t look very good Louisa’ and produced a doctor’s light to examine his eyes. He wasn’t crying or anything as Mum poked him and then Mum said ‘you have been feeding him haven’t you? He looks a bit dehydrated to me’. Panic gripped me as I thought shit I have had this baby for three days and I haven’t fed it! Then to my horror my mother whipped out her boob and started to feed the baby in the car park………..

……….Having a chat with Jay about sending an email around to announce the arrival of my son and I am asking how he wants to be referred too, as for some reason he is not the babies father. Then I realise that I am getting married to Jay in eight and half months time meaning that I will be about to drop as we walk up the aisle and the baby isn’t even his. Yet I am already cradling this child in my arms and neglecting to feed it all very odd…

……….Now I am by a river and the baby has not only grown but changed colour. He is half-cast and is sitting up on a plastic mat bawling his eyes out. I look closely and find that he has had a toilet accident. I scoop him up and tell him not to worry it is a natural occurrence as it was his first time and I dangle him in the river. The next thing I know he is swimming and I am trying to keep hold of him like I do when practicing diver rescue. I am wondering where this child got his intelligence from, being able to swim at such a young age…….

Bridesmaid dress saga

Bridesmaid dress stress!

It is nine months until our wedding and even though it seems ages away I wanted to go bridesmaid dress shopping so that we could decide on the colour scheme for the rest of the wedding. My sister is off round Europe (lucky girl – deep post travel blues have descended over Jay and I) for three weeks in August so we thought we would go before she went. Also having mother breathing down my neck saying ‘have you got the bridesmaid dresses sorted yet?’ hasn’t helped matters.

We all met up at the train station in Alderley for our adventure into Manchester. This was scuppered right at the start due to blooming engineering works. This meant we had to get a train to Manchester Airport then a coach from there. Now we were behind schedule so we grabbed a quick bite to eat then ran down to Kendals. Lucy was moaning she had indigestion because I was making her rush until she saw the Disney store and wanted to go and check it out. She is 26 years old but has a fetish for Eeyore - need I say anymore?

Panting and sweating we arrived in the changing rooms at Kendals and they tried on a purple bodice and skirt which looked lovely on Lucy but not so great on Aimee. Then they tried on the same outfit in a deep red and it looked good on Aimee and bad on Lucy. The red top and skirt that Lucy tried on were a slightly different colour and the face she pulled (she hates red) would have made anything she was wearing look horrible. Sadly, we saw this expression on several occasions throughout the day.

Next stop was our 1pm appointment at Pronuptial bridal shop. Lucy was mortified when the lady burst into her changing room unannounced when she had no top on, to pin her into one of the dresses. We had much of the same scenario here with Lucy pulling a face at every dress we tried on. I do have to say that the selection was a bit poor to say the least. Aimee looked lovely in a lilac floaty dress but it had straps, which is a no go for Lucy because she wants a bodice and skirt. The assistant gave me one of those sympathetic looks as Lucy scrunched up her face at yet another dress. As we had no idea of colour the assistant took out some colour charts where Lucy liked the really brash colours and Aimee and I like the more subtle normal colours. Quote Lucy; ‘Why do you keep picking all these murky colours? I wouldn’t put my bridesmaids in that!’ By murky she means lilac, powder blue and dark purple where as my definition would be brown, black or grey.

Next stop was Bride be Lovely where my Mum actually got her wedding dress. We walked in the door and the mannequin had a lovely orange dress on. You might think ‘ugh’ but it was the taffeta type material that had a gold shimmer to it and was quite different. Jason’s favourite colour is orange. So Lucy grabbed a load of dresses and Aimee struggled to find one she like but we got there in the end. The orange dress went on first and I have to say Lucy did look lovely in it. The style and colour really suited her. Aimee tried it on and now it was her turn to pull a face but the only one she pulled all day and she apologised for it later (bless her). I thought she looked quite nice in it. Then I realised that the gold shimmer wouldn’t go with my dress as it is more of a silver colour.

Tempers were wearing thin and as Lucy couldn’t persuade me to buy the orange dress she pulled yet more faces at everything else. Well I lost my rag and had a go at her in the middle of the changing rooms. Aimee shrank back into her room and the curtains were twitching in the occupied ones. I began to think this would be a good idea for a reality TV show ‘Wedding Planning Hell’ or ‘Bridal Party Bashing.’

Anyway, to cut a long story short we didn’t find anything so we went to Mr Thomas’s Chop House for a much-needed bottle of wine. Lucy’s fiancé kindly picked us up and dropped us into the Drum and Monkey where we had another glass of wine. To be honest I’m not really sure what happened but the conversation severely deteriorated and Lucy spat ‘shut up’ at my sister, which I wasn’t very happy about. This is supposed to be happy planning for the wedding but it ended in tears. I walked out of the pub telling them I wanted neither of them to be bridesmaids. This wasn’t true – well in Aimee’s case it wasn’t but I was so pissed off I had had enough.

Oh the joy’s of planning a wedding. Any hints and tips as what to do about my bridesmaids dresses is much appreciated.